EXHale...

For about 2 weeks, I have been thinking of writing why I had a series of unsuccessful relationships in my past, and why I still know how to MESS things up BIG time and why I think I am a misfit when it comes to relationships :D

Just that I have not been able to gather enough courage to go public with that amount of truth...

I should start an anonymous blog !!! or steal someone's diary and write what I want to in there... or hack someone's account and post it in their name !!!

what else can i do?

Write it on a wall in UK :D when no one is watching... Graffiti... with the crazy people I know here, it might just sell for millions...

Make a painting out of my thoughts... again worth some greenies...

Umm... take pictures and say what i want to say in code... Naah... I make an attempt to take happy pictures or make them look encouraging.. with some exceptions of course !!!

What else?

Talk to someone about it? I did... with three friends...

One took a split second to agree to the fact that I suck !!!

the other gave me a lot of gyan and tried to pep me up, and partially agreed...

and the third, made fun of me and applauded at the honest confession !!!

For some reason, I am not feeling too bad about it... there are good things about me, there are bad ones too... Not being able to handle people I love is one of the BADDEST ones !!!

Why am i writing about it right now?

Valid point...

And I am doing it ,

Because I think i should take that thought of thinking about writing about thinking about why I suck should be out of my system...

And because I have been carrying this thought for a long time... years maybe !!! It needs to go out of my system... it need a body wash that can clean things from inside...

Or maybe I just need to eat at a dhaba, have chai at a road side stall, drive the entire night, have a few paranthas at murthal, honk the horn when i feel like, have a few golgappas till my eyes and nose start running, flip through the useless TV channels, etc etc...

Ok... so two things now...

1. No Gyan please :) take this post into your stride and humor :)

2. Read the previous post and help me out !!! not with Fishing Rods and instructions on how to fish, but with some FISH :)

Open Book...

What a way to start a day... BLOGTHINGS...

Got in my RSS reader a link to find out what my name means :) And I did...

here is what comes up... Most of it is bang on... some I would like to believe... and a few.. umm.. not too sure of...

"You are influential and persuasive. You tend to have a lot of power over people.
Generally, you use your powers for good. You excel at solving other people's problems.
Occasionally, you do get a little selfish and persuade people to do things that are only in your interest.

You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something.
You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense.
You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun.

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.
You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.
You have the classic "Type A" personality.

You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong.
You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know.
You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do.

You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out.
Success comes rather easily for you... especially in business and academia.
Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You're a strong person.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.
You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.
You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

You are a seeker. You often find yourself restless - and you have a lot of questions about life.
You tend to travel often, to fairly random locations. You're most comfortable when you're far away from home.
You are quite passionate and easily tempted. Your impulses sometimes get you into trouble.

You are full of energy. You are spirited and boisterous.
You are bold and daring. You are willing to do some pretty outrageous things.
Your high energy sometimes gets you in trouble. You can have a pretty bad temper at times.

You are balanced, orderly, and organized. You like your ducks in a row.
You are powerful and competent, especially in the workplace.
People can see you as stubborn and headstrong. You definitely have a dominant personality.

You are very charming... dangerously so. You have the potential to break a lot of hearts.
You know how what you want, how to get it, and that you will get it.
You have the power to rule the world. Let's hope you're a benevolent dictator!

You are fair, honest, and logical. You are a natural leader, and people respect you.
You never give up, and you will succeed... even if it takes you a hundred tries.
You are rational enough to see every part of a problem. You are great at giving other people advice."

Care to find out more about yourself too? click HERE...

Learning Growing Managing...

Things have been kinda different, strange, scary, unexpected, tough, hectic in the last few days... and I am looking for new ways to destress myself... and one of the newer things that I tried was reading quotes...

Had a Reader's Digest with me... that helped... and then Bloglines Quotes Feed pitched in too...

Here are a few that I really liked...

"When the gods wish to punish us, they answer our prayers."

Oscar Wilde

"Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy."

Edger Bergen

And here are a few I liked from RD.... some of them seem so apt to me...

"Having to explain it means you probably shouldn't have said it."

Cary Clock

"Hot Heads and Cold Hearts never solved anything."

Billy Graham

"The formula for a successfull relationship is simple: Treat all disasters as trivialities, but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster."

Quentin Crisp

"Its just like Magic. When you live by yourself, all of your annoying habits are gone."

Merril Markoe